A Man's System

Blog No. 67: I Miss My Own Bed

---> Blog Start 8:37 PM

Title speaks for itself.

My living situation is a little awkward. I'm living at my mom's apartment. She moved out with my aunt and her kids while giving the house to me and my sister and my brother-in-law to live in. But at the start of term, I started to live over here at the apartment because it would be easier to get rides back and forth from school and home until I get a driver's liscense to drive myself. I would get rides from my mom. I don't want to ask John or Audrey for rides because they have a baby on the way to worry about.

With all this said, it seems that I won't be in my own bed for some time.

The first time I failed the driver's test, I was completely unaware of the merging into the bike lane rules and did not even finish the driver's test. The second time around, I got disqualified for jerky turning.

Sure, the bed I have doesn't hold up my legs and my room at the house is a complete mess, but it was my bed, my mess. I want to wake up from my own bed, complain about my *strand-up comedy* in the mornings as well as the lumpy bed and the small bathroom, and have the luxury of doing whatever I want in my room. I feel detached from my musical instruments, my video games, my books, my sketchbooks, my under-construction-dart-board-of-Zac-Efron's-face, my writings, my tablet and photoshop, and my Gilmore Girls Fridays. I had a system! You don't mess up a man's system, man!

Life here at the apartment just gets more forced. Sure I love everyone here, but I'm a guy that gets bored very easily of the same thing everyday, day by day. I can't be as free doing my homework or typing up poems or photoshopping pictures of Kaylah onto firemen without someone looking over my shoulder, curious as to what I'm doing.

I want to wake up to a possible threat of an eye gouge because of how close the bed is to the window sill. I want to draw/write/paint my walls after a very clear and memorable dream I just had just so I won't forget it. I want to wake up in a rush and pull through different combinations of clothes in my closet instead of just wearing the same ones I have available to me. I want to finally finish my new Kingdom Hearts game I have set up with my TV, and possibly pull out the N64 for funsies. I want to hang Xmas ribbons off of my cieling and attach different colored paper cranes on them, pretending I had a chandelier in the middle of my room. I want to kick out my window screen so that I can sit on the window and play my alto sax/guitar/violin at night, just to annoy the neighbors.

I wanna be that guy who can go to his own solitary room and lock the door behind him.

---> Blog End 9:11 PM (HO DANG!)